 |
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
 |
 |
|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Shifting from the Outside-In Everyone everywhere wears masks to get through life, but it is my experience that Los Angeles is devoted to appearances, to the preservation of the mask, in a way that outdoes any other place I have ever been. LA's tacit tenet of "it's not how you feel, it's how you look" creates for this writer a climate of constant wonder if there is any there there behind the faces of the people I interact with. Of course not everyone residing in LA represents these values, but I have witnessed even the most empowered women looking at their butts an extra time in the mirror while visiting. This summer I headed out to Tinsel Town to celebrate the birthday of a family member. It was a tough trip. Not only was I influenced by the land of insecurity, but a romance was failing, my beloved pet had recently passed, and I was going to see, perhaps for the last time, an old family friend who is living with severe metastasized cancer. Although her plight certainly put things in perspective for me, it actually worsened my mood. I had a moment of panic: As much as I wanted to see her, how could I "get it up" to do so when inside I felt so small and "off"? The answer was not found in contemplation, meditation, or grounding, or any of those useful tools that I love to practice and teach. It was in dressing up. I chose to go to the lunch in costume. I put on a lacy LA skirt, sparkly earrings, heels and some tasteful but apparent make-up. Instantly my mood changed. I felt confident, feminine and . . . pretty. It wasn't that my pain vanished or I was in denial. My discomfort just wasn't running the show. The costume brought other parts of me to the surface, which in the given environment and circumstances helped me feel respect for myself and in turn gave me the ability to be open and present for my ailing friend. It is so important for us to decipher our masks and let them move to the side every now and then so our soul has a chance to breathe and we can connect deeply with self and others. And sometimes it can be equally important to get those masks out, dust them off and put them to good use -- to shine through them. In acting technique this is called "working from the outside in." Think of how a good accent transforms Meryl Streep, or how the extra pounds, fake teeth and chin padding turned the beautiful Charlize Theron into a 'monster' in her cinematic portrayal of mass murderer Eileen Wournos. In this universe we play many roles, so why not dress for the part when appropriate? Here are some tools to help you shift "from the outside in."
What role would you like to enhance in your life, but feel "it just isn't you"? Business woman, gardener, vixen, good friend, father? See if you can find an outfit or a trinket, piece of clothing or furniture that helps you "get into the part." Then wear it, sit in it, etc. and become the role. Colors Color can be a powerful way to shift your mood, or make your point. I once knew I needed to stand out at a business meeting to get my point across. I was nervous. I wrapped myself in a red shawl. I felt powerful. It worked. Music This probably isn't news to any of you but a good reminder: Music gets you "in the mood." Pick the mood you want, play the tunes to get you there. Movement Feeling anxious? Trying walking (literally) as you would imagine the Dalai Lama (or another spiritual leader you resonate with) would walk in your circumstances. Fake it Till You Make it . . . is all about working from the outside in. Rehearse how it feels to succeed in your body, posture, tone and feeling. Have fun. And remember, Love Yourself no matter what. |
 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
 |
 |
 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
© 2003 Blair Glaser. All rights reserved.
Designed and Developed by Hugh Sansom | GravityLens